Fatal Attraction
It is amazing the way we are drawn to things we know are bad for us.
For example today I bought junk food. I know that its expensive and I cannot really afford it and I certainly don't need it. I have also wasted time playing games when I know I have better and more important things to do. Perhaps the most potent example is now. I am writing this impart because I have, at times, thought it would be cool to write a blog but mostly because I know I should go to bed and this is a great way to procrastinate.
Tomorrow I will be poorer, fatter, farther behind and more tired.
Yet when faced with each decision I feel compelled to do what is worse for me.
I wonder if it is merely the short term indulgance winning out over the long term gains. Perhaps it is. Sometime I seems like more than that though. I've been through the loop enough times to know that the short term gains are often false. That generally after doing something I thing I shouldn't have I will feel terrible and that the attaction and glitter of whatever it is I am being inticed towards is false.
I still get sucked in almost everytime.
Id like to blame it on some evil force so I dont feel so bad and it isnt my fault.
Unfortunately one of the things I have come to realise is that while we dont choose our circumstance we are still entirely responsible for our actions. In every case I choose what I do. Even if it were life and death it would still be my choice. So that means have no scape goat. I can not blame what I have done on anyone else. It means when im tired tomorrow I will only be able to blame myself.
I guess it also means that before I get too depressed about it I should probably go to bed.
nite.
For example today I bought junk food. I know that its expensive and I cannot really afford it and I certainly don't need it. I have also wasted time playing games when I know I have better and more important things to do. Perhaps the most potent example is now. I am writing this impart because I have, at times, thought it would be cool to write a blog but mostly because I know I should go to bed and this is a great way to procrastinate.
Tomorrow I will be poorer, fatter, farther behind and more tired.
Yet when faced with each decision I feel compelled to do what is worse for me.
I wonder if it is merely the short term indulgance winning out over the long term gains. Perhaps it is. Sometime I seems like more than that though. I've been through the loop enough times to know that the short term gains are often false. That generally after doing something I thing I shouldn't have I will feel terrible and that the attaction and glitter of whatever it is I am being inticed towards is false.
I still get sucked in almost everytime.
Id like to blame it on some evil force so I dont feel so bad and it isnt my fault.
Unfortunately one of the things I have come to realise is that while we dont choose our circumstance we are still entirely responsible for our actions. In every case I choose what I do. Even if it were life and death it would still be my choice. So that means have no scape goat. I can not blame what I have done on anyone else. It means when im tired tomorrow I will only be able to blame myself.
I guess it also means that before I get too depressed about it I should probably go to bed.
nite.
posted by Kreg at 2:03 PM
1 Comments:
On the other hand there is a vocal minority of the psychiatric profession that insist that nurture has a significant impact on us to the extent that we may actually have no real capability to make choices, that our pre-natal, infantile and childhood programming is so effective that our parents mold us almost entirely in to the end product we become regardless of our retrograde attempts to assert our individuality, and that nothing short of a true life-shattering experience can act to break this mold. We may indeed be theoretically capable of choice yet practically totally incapable of it. Does not the human species delight in so many ways?
On another note, how come I didn't get an invitation to the launch party of this glamorous new blog?
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